I have lived with type 1 diabetes for almost 22 years. My husband and I have been together for 15 years; married 13 of those. And since he came into my life I'm happy to say that I have not lived with type 1 diabetes alone.
He is with me every step! He wants to know as much about diabetes management as I do and often he does. Sometimes, he looks at my record book to help me figure out patterns in my blood glucose levels. It may be my diabetes but my whole family lives with it, especially him. Whatever happens to me affects him in a big way!
About a year ago, I put him through something unthinkable and I hope I feel the guilt always because it reminds me that we are in this together.
It was unintentional, and unfortunate for him, but it taught me a valuable lesson.
We attended a family occasion. I did all the usual tasks to make sure that I enjoyed the day without stressing about blood sugars. I tested every couple of hours and adjusted for highs and lows.
Unfortunately, that one last drink, the multiple boluses I gave myself for a 4 course meal and not knowing as much about how alcohol effects glucagon as I do now, led to me collapsing in the shower the next morning out cold.
My husband knew to test my blood sugars and that it was probably a hypo. He also knew that I probably did not have my glucagon kit with me. While he was testing my sugars he was panicking about what he was going to do if it was an unconscious hypo. He didn't want to call the paramedics but he knew he would have to.
Lucky for both of us, I started to come around. I was "loopy" but I was responsive. It probably was the recovery side of an undetected hypo.
One of the first things I said to him was "I'm sorry", not because it was my fault that I passed out, well not really, but that I was sorry he had experienced that panic and terror of trying to figure out what to do.
I spend so much time thinking about myself and how to take care of myself better, so that I can be around for my family for decades and I wasn't prepared for someone else having to figure it out.
I realised that just because I have never needed my glucagon kit doesn't mean that I should not carry it. Just because there are hospitals everywhere doesn't mean I should rely on someone to bring me.
I was consumed by the guilt I felt for what he went through because of me.
I now make sure I have an in-date glucagon kit in my purse at all times. I'm pursuing a Continuous Glucose Monitoring System to help with nocturnal hypos. AND I will never, never drink that amount of alcohol again!!! And so far, so good.
Thank you, marvellous, wonderful hubby for taking on me and my diabetes and for your support and help with it.
Thank you, marvellous, wonderful hubby for taking on me and my diabetes and for your support and help with it.